SIDE 1

Well what have we here? A nice plump little Duckling.

(A net drops over UGLY.)
 

Gotcha, my beauty.
 

Honk, honk, honk.
 

It's no good you struggling and honking. I've got a family to feed and you'll make a fine Sunday roast.
 

Honk! Honk!
 

Now, where's my knife? Phew, it's colder than a penguin's picnic out here tonight. Darn, I must've left it in my car.
 

SIDE 2

Duck!
 

Yes correct, it's a Duck.
 

Duck!
 

Yes I know it's a ruddy duck!
 

Actually, I think I'm a Mallard.
 

Duck!

(There is the sound of a shattering window as a baseball whizzes on and strikes the CAT on the back of the head.)
 

Goose! Struck out by a fowl ball.

(The CAT collapses and falls, unconscious into his own bowl. UGLY doesn't know what to do.)
 

You broke the window!
 

The ball's gone inside.