SIDE 1

JAMES

(staring at LADAHLORD and afraid)

Who are you?


LADAHLORD

Unimportant ! Who. Are. You? James Henry Trotter

(LADAHLORD stands and begins to cross slowly towards JAMES.)

JAMES

If you come any closer, I ll scream for my aunts.

LADAHLORD

And what makes you think those two hideous creatures would come running to your rescue?

JAMES

They re my family.

LADAHLORD

Ha! Says who?

JAMES

That s what I ve been told.

LADAHLORD

Ah! But do YOU think so?

JAMES

I... ? I...

LADAHLORD

(passionately with enthusiasm)

And there it is ! The very first primordial ooze of an inkling that has the potential to lead to so many other fan-tas-ma-rific things! Ha! James! That bag, right over there, contains something remark-u-lous! Are you willing to reach into the great unknown and find out what s inside?

JAMES

I... I don t know.

LADAHLORD

Come on, James ! Only you have the power to change the course of your wretched little life. What s it gonna be? Victim? Or hero?

(JAMES looks at LADAHLORD and then at the bag. And then JAMES thrusts his hand deep inside the bag.)

LADAHLORD

(screaming at the top of his lungs)

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

JAMES

(screaming in reaction)

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

( JAMES removes a dusty old book from the bag.)

It s okay! It s okay! It s just a book! Why were you screaming?

LADAHLORD

To get your undivided attention.

(whispering)

What s inside the book, James?

JAMES

(reading)

It s full of recipes... with very strange ingredients.

LADAHLORD

Not recipes No! Potions, tonics, spells! Now, you must pick a spell from the book, devour the potion, and fabulous, unbelievable things will happen to you!