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Script
Audition Central: Xanadu JR.
Script: Kira
SIDE 1
KIRA
Zeus, I hear your warnings, and so run I must away from this Sonny Malone, who has stolen my heart.(SONNY enters)
SONNY
You would have to be blind not to see that sign just staring you in the face!KIRA
Sonny, please stop talking, it hurts.SONNY
Hey, Kira, now don t be a bummer.KIRA
Sadly, bummer I am, and bummer I shall be. Sonny, it is here I must take my leave of you.SONNY
Leave of me? Like leave me?KIRA
I must go.SONNY
But, you can t leave, the whole Xanadu thing. I need you here.KIRA
You can do this without me, surely. And when the Xanadu club is open and thriving you shall pause a moment and reflect on us. And wherever I might be, I will know we ll always have this roller disco.SONNY
Yeah. But I need you just to be around.KIRA
Stuff and nonsense. I have met you only a moment earlier. We do not know one another well enough to have any significant ties. Do we?SONNY
Well, yes, I guess you re right and all but ahh don t walk away!!SIDE 2
KIRA
How?ZEUS
Impossible!APHRODITE
She proves this, she s good.THETIS
Zeus, I remind you of my son, Achilles, the greatest warrior of Greece? And how he was destroyed by Paris, who shot his arrow straight through Achilles heel, thus killing him? For as you may recall, dear Zeus, all of the gods offspring are dipped into the river Styx, thus making them impervious to injury. But they are held by their ankles, so that their only vulnerable spot is their ankles.ZEUS
I remember this, Thetis, but I do not see how THETIS
Master Zeus, I appeal to you. Look at the attire Clio has donned. The woolen woven fabric she has placed around her ankles APHRODITE
The leg warmers!KIRA
But, of course! No curse can penetrate this demigoddess. Not as long as these mighty leg warmers are on my ankles.THETIS
Oh, if only I had thought to knit leg warmers for my brave son Achilles.APHRODITE
Then it is true. Love has triumphed. Clio truly did fall in love with that mortal.ZEUS
I don't care. She will be banished anyway.SIDE 3
KIRA
(pure Julliard)I take my place before you, great and oh, merciful Father Zeus; Hera, wife of Zeus; Thetis, Goddess of the Sea; Aphrodite, Goddess of Love, to beg your forgiveness.
ZEUS
Dearest Clio, you have given way to the curse of love, inflicted upon you by your mischievous sisters. And that is a foolishness and a folly which I cannot accept from one of my offspring. And so I must punish you.HERA
But my Lord, surely as you have created this child, with the Goddess of Memory, surely, you have it in your heart to forgive her.ZEUS
These are the rules I have created, and they are the rules by which I must abide.APHRODITE
But I, Aphrodite, Goddess of Love, implore you. Be lenient with her. I sense this love is not a curse, but actually genuine love.ZEUS
Never! It is a curse. A curse placed upon her by her sisters. And she must suffer the consequences.THETIS
I, Thetis, a Goddess of the Sea, look into the eyes of this child and know it is not a curse but actual love.KIRA
I know this as well, but my only evidence is my feelings.APHRODITE
She s got it bad and that ain t good.ZEUS
I shall now proclaim my sentence: eternal banishment in the nether world.THETIS
Stay your hand, my Lord. I shall present existence of genuine love that can be proved not with feelings but with hard evidence.HERA
What?SIDE 4
DANNY
Hurry up, the sign is so clear anybody can see it.
SONNY
All right, see you later.
KIRA
G'day, mate!(#22 HERMES begins. HERMES enters.)
HERMES
Clio!KIRA
Uh! Oh it is you! Hermes, the fleet-footed messenger of the gods. What brings you to me, Hermes?HERMES
Clio, I bring you a message from Zeus.KIRA
Yes, Hermes.HERMES
He wishes to know if you have seen his sign?KIRA
Yes, yes. I have seen the sign, Hermes.HERMES
He also wishes to remind you that the penalty for creating art on one s own is eternal damnation in the netherworld.KIRA
I am aware of that; you may tell Zeus.HERMES
And thirdly, he wishes you to know that the penalty for loving a mortal is eternal damnation in the netherworld.KIRA
Hermes, why does Zeus tell me these things? I love no one; I have created nothing! I am an ageless and loveless, uncreative being. Why does Zeus accuse me so? Why Hermes, why?HERMES
Girlfriend, I don t know your life.(HERMES exits with attitude)
SIDE 5
EUTERPE
Notice how we do inspire the humans here in Los Angeles and Orange Counties.MELPOMENE
Inspiration here, it would seem, is received like water in a land of drought.MUSES
Oooh, snapeth.(#5 THE MUSES MUSE (PART 1) begins.)
KIRA
(enters and speaks formally)Huzzah, Sisters!
MUSES
Huzzah to Clio, leader of the Muses!KIRA
As I am being pursued by the mortal named Sonny Malone, my intercourse with you must be fleeting.MELPOMENE
Yes, my younger and exceedingly immature sister, I indeed notice your labors with this human are more then ardent are you falling in love with him? Or do you simply wish to create art yourself?KIRA
You speak with a serpent s tongue, my old, old, ancient and potentially senile sister. I know that for Muses to create is forbidden by Zeus himself. Forbidden almost as much as falling in love with a mortal. My work with the one they call Sonny Malone is purely selfish. For Zeus has appeared to me in dreams and told me that one day soon I will inspire a creation so wondrous that I will be granted the gift of... Xanadu!(#6 THE MUSES MUSE (PART 2) begins.)
MUSES
(except Melpomene and Calliope)Xanadu!
MELPOMENE
Xanadu? The gift so grand that none of us truly knows what it is?SIDE 6
KIRA
Zeus tells me he will be sending a sign. And now I must go and inspire great work!(#7 THE MUSES MUSE (PART 3) begins. KIRA exits.)
EUTERPE
Sweet Sisters of Inspiration!TERPSICHORE
Let us attend to our various charges!(#8 THE MUSES MUSE (PART 4) begins. The MUSES exit, leaving MELPOMENE and CALLIOPE alone.) begins. KIRA exits.)
MELPOMENE
Calliope, hasten hither.CALLIOPE
I m already hither.MELPOMENE
I crave a word with you. I need not tell you, as first born, I was entitled to the position of leader of the Muses.CALLIOPE
And yet Zeus did not grant thusly. What gives?MELPOMENE
Achelous. [akhe-ló-os]CALLIOPE
The river god?MELPOMENE
He was a river god, and he was a rambling man. He left me with my daughters, Molpe [mol-pay], Peisonoe [pay-so-no-ee], Thelxiepeia [thel-ksee-EH-pee-ah] CALLIOPE
Like a Jennifer or a Susan would have killed you.MELPOMENE
Ah, my daughters! For years I instructed them in the lute and the flute. And now they sit by the seaside singing and playing and luring sailors to their rocky deaths. Yes, my daughters, the Sirens.