SIDE 1

(ALADDIN stands and dusts himself off.)

ALADDIN

But I do like Jasmine. I mean, "The Princess!" Ugh! I must've sounded so stupid! Then again, what does it matter? I'm never gonna see her again. Me, the "street rat"!
(beat)
Besides, she deserves a prince. Or at least someone better than me. Oh why did I ever meet her?
(beat)
Boy, I'm glad I met her!
(ALADDIN collapses to a sitting position. For the first time, he takes notice of all the objects around him.)
Look at all this junk! I bet no one's been in here for years.
(A small lamp catches ALADDIN's eye. He picks it up.)
Something's written on this thing. Let's see here...
(ALADDIN rubs the lamp with his sleeve. Lights flicker. Smoke fills the air. Lights snap to black. When lights are restored, a GENIE stands before ALADDIN.)

GENIE

Oy! Ten thousand years in a tin can'll give you such a crick in the neck!
(cracks his neck)
Okay, that's better!
(to ALADDIN)
Now then, "Your wish is my command," yadda yadda, you know the drill, so shoot...
(ALADDIN is too astonished to speak. He looks from GENIE to the Lamp and back to GENIE.)
C'mon, kid, what's it gonna be? Cash, camels, Casbahs?
(ALADDIN still can't form words.)
You must want something...
(GENIE claps his hands in ALADDIN's face.)
Hey! What's you say your name was?

ALADDIN

(wary)
Aladdin.

GENIE

"Aladdin." He speaks! Okay! This is gonna be a snap! May I call you "Al?" You know, Al, you're a lot smaller than my last master. Either that, or I'm getting bigger. Do these harem pants make me look fat?

ALADDIN

(amazed)
Wait a minute - I'm your "master."

GENIE

Hello? "Direct from the lamp?" It's the Genie with the light brown hair!

ALADDIN

You mean I, like, get to make a wish and everything?

GENIE

Yeah, Al, like three wishes!

ALADDIN

Awesome!

GENIE

But no wishing for more wishes, okay? 'Cuz that is just so yesterday. But otherwise, you're the boss. This is your lucky day. All your dreams are coming true
(beat)
Maybe I should explain. Fine.
(as if to a musical conductor)
Maestro? What key are we in?
(A bell tone sounds. ALADDIN is completely bewildered.)
It's a musical!

SIDE 2

GENIE

Excuse me? Did you rub my lamp? Did I not offer you the standard three-wish package? And all of a sudden you're telling me what I can and cannot do? Step over here!
(ALADDIN crosses to stand on a spot indicated by GENIE. GENIE whistles as if hailing a cab. A MAGIC CARPET enters and comes to a stop by ALADDIN.)

ALADDIN

Totally awesome!

GENIE

(mimicking ALADDIN)
"Can't do this. Can't do that. Can't get us out of here."
(gruff)
Have a seat.
(ALADDIN gets on the CARPET.)
And scoot over.
(ALADDIN adjusts his position as GENIE climbs aboard.)
All right, in case of emergency, the exits are here, here, here, and back there somewhere. So keep your hands and arms inside the Carpet at all times because we ... are ... outta here!
(The CARPET whirls about the stage. ALADDIN and GENIE hold on tightly. Eventually, the CARPET comes to rest. Lights brighten.)
And there we are: welcome back to the desert. We do realize you have a choice when it comes to air travel ...
(aside)
Not!
(to ALADDIN)
... so thank you for choosing Magic Carpet Airlines. Thank you. Watch your head. B'bye now. G'bye. Have a nice day. B'bye.
(beat)
Ha! You thought I couldn't get us out of a lousy cave?