Script

Side 1

JUNIE B.

Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! It's Lucille! Lucille, my bestest friend from kindergarten last year!!!

(LUCILLE looks over at her, waves a small wave, and returns to her desk.)

JUNIE B.

Lucille! Lucille! It's me, Junie B.! It's your bestest friend from kindergarten, Junie B. Jones! I am so glad to see you, friend!!!

(JUNIE B. is vigorously shaking LUCILLE's hand.)

LUCILLE

Stop it, Junie B.! Stop it!!! You are wrinkling my new dress. This thing cost a fortune.

(LUCILLE fluffs her dress and JUNIE B. does too.)

JUNIE B.

There. Good as new.

(JUNIE B. grabs LUCILLE.)

Come on, Lucille! Let's go find two desks together. I think
we should sit near the door. Want to? Huh? If we sit near the door, we can stare at people who walk down the hall.

LUCILLE

No, Junie B. No. I am going to sit at this desk right here. I already picked it out with my two new friends, Camille and Chenille.

(CAMILLE and CHENILLE, twins, dressed in different shades of Lucille's dress, wave goodbye to their offstage mother.)

JUNIE B.

Twins! Twins! They're twins, Lucille! This is our lucky day! Come on Lucille, let's go touch them. Hurry, hurry! Before a line forms.

LUCILLE

Stop it, Junie B.! Camille and Chenille don't want to be touched. And besides. I am their new best friend. Not you.

JUNIE B.

Yes, but I can be their best friend along with you, right, Lucille? All I have to do is meet them, right? And then all of us can be bestest friends together.

LUCILLE

No, Junie B., I'm sorry. You and I have already been best friends, remember? We were best friends for a whole long year. And so now it's time for Camille and Chenille to get a turn. It's only fair of me. And besides, their names rhyme with mine.

(LUCILLE strikes a pose, and CAMILLE and CHENILLE follow her.)

Lucille!

CAMILLE

Camille!

CHENILLE

Chenille!

LUCILLE, CAMILLE, CHENILLE

Yeah!

LUCILLE

Doesn't that sound marvelous?

Side 2

SHELDON

No one touch this please. Even though I came back to class today, I am still not totally right up here.

MR. SCARY

Oh, yes, Sheldon. I am very aware of that.

SHELDON

I probably shouldn't play in the kickball tournament on Friday either.

MR. SCARY

Don't worry. I'm sure we can come up with something else you can do in the tournament.

(JUNIE B. puts her head inside her sweater and slumps in her chair.)

You too, Junie B. We'll think of something else you can do too, okay?

LUCILLE

Who cares about kicking a stupid ball anyway? I'm going to be the head cheerleader!

(LUCILLE takes out pom-poms and fluffs her dress.)

MAY

Who wants to be a stupid old cheerleader? I'm going to do crowd control. 'Cause I already have a badge at home. So all I'll need is a big stick to poke people with!

(Everyone looks at her.)

And a gas mask.


MR. SCARY

I don't think crowd control will be necessary, May.

(MAY plops down in her seat, miffed.)

SHELDON

Well, I already know what I am going to do. I'm going to do a halftime show!

MR. SCARY

A halftime show?

SHELDON

Yes, yes!!! 'Cause my daddy used to play in his high school band! And he already taught me how to march and play the cymbals like a real professional band guy!